My Struggle is Over

Went to church today... Very good service.

You know, it is so funny, but when you need a word from God, the preacher looks directly at you, almost makes eye contact, but they say, "I don't know who this is for"....... I love it.

Anyone that knows me, knows that I have had a rough 2 years, and last night, I know it had to be God, but I got this boost of confidence and determination, and I sat on my bed, I prayed to God and I said, Lord, I trust you. I'm coming out of this. I claim my breakthrough.

Today, the Lord spoke loud and clear, and a few things he brought a few things to light that I have truly been fighting with.

1) YOU CAN'T MAKE PEOPLE LOVE YOU - I am the type of person who has a genuine love for people. I don't say I love you unless I mean it, and this year, I've been hurt. I've been betrayed. I've been lied to and lied on and it hurts. I have spent so many nights crying and praying, asking God to remove the hurt, to give me peace, because my conscience knows that I have not done what I have been accused of, therefore I don't have to hide, or tell a lie to cover a lie. I know that I have been True to myself and I have been true to others. I've apologized for things I ahven't done, and I have taken the blame, just to keep those I love close to me.  But today, GOD said, you can't make people love you - which I already knew, but I think I really needed to hear it again.

2) YOUR CRYING STOPS NOW - He said, you shouldn't have to spend your life crying. He said it doesn't matter what you're crying about, romance, finance - whatever... He said, what you sow in tears you will reap in joy. Your sorrow should be equal to your joy.

3) KEEP YOUR HANDS UP - He said, keeping your hands up mean 3 things:
             1) I SURRENDER - it means, God you win. I can't fight  no more, we do it your way.
             2) IT'S OVER - this means, I'm done, bottom line. I throw my hands up cause this is over, I'm not doing it anymore.
             3) I WORSHIP - This means I worship you Lord, I praise you Lord, I lift my hands to you.


For a long time I was like a lot of people who felt like the presence of God was only felt through a select people and I wasn't one of them. I thought that I could pray hard, tithe and believe in God a he would provide the things I needed.

At this point in my life, I have learned what it TRULY means to trust and depend on God for everything. When you have "no worries" or "very little" and when you don't think you "need" God for anything, then you respond to worship differently, you respond to the whole concept differently.

When you are in a position where you see no other way, you don't have anything and you don't see the light, then you truly learn what it is to lean on God. You truly learn the importance of "serving God the right way". 

Well God said my Struggle is over. I claim it, I receive it and I thank God for it.